Butterfly Angels

Butterfly Angels Three

The annual art fair at church got me painting something new.  My husband cut the butterfly shapes out of scrap wood, and I loved on them with paint.

The first one was the Blue Butterfly Angel. She fluttered in slowly over a couple of weeks.  I didn’t plan too much and let her come.  This is good for me, because in the past, I’ve planned too much. My goal has been to be more abstract.

Butterfly angel in blue.jpg

 

The second was a Butterfly Angel Mermaid. I made one like this for my granddaughter, and I know mermaids sell big where I live, so I’ll probably make more.  She took a couple of days as the date for the art fair approached.

butterfly mermaid nov 2017

Right after I finished the mermaid, I started on the third angel. I knew this one would special because I could see angel signs in the grain of the wood. I had traced the shape with the stencil to use the indented oval (a knot hole?) for the “face.” This piece flowed more quickly because, 1. I was warmed up, and 2. I let myself go allowing the wood grain, and the angel, to guide me. It was an emotional experience reminding me that this is the work of my heart.

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I let some of the wood show through on this one. And used a melted marble for the face.

I was a counselor for most of my life. Recently, I have become a writer. But drawing and painting have always come easier to me than anything else. I’ve been an artist since I was a child. For years, I’ve heard a voice urging me to paint angels! The peace  I feel when I heed that call is like coming home.

I sold the mermaid at the art fair and have plans for the Blue Butterfly Angel. But it’s okay if I keep the running/dancing tree angel who reminds me to let go and follow my heart.

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Boundaries for A People Pleasing Introvert

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I know it’s been a while since I’ve written here. Being “retired” from the old job and creating my own schedule opens doors to an abundance of opportunities. Home improvements, family needs, requests from friends and acquaintances, volunteering, and life tend to push”Loving Me, Too” to the back burner where my painting muse is hollering for attention. But all the while, I’ve been thinking about writing here and learning more about loving me, too and what I need to take care of myself better. Here are some boundaries I need to clarify:

  1.  I will not commit to or attend regularly any new groups where the primary activity includes sitting on my butt for an hour. This is especially true of committee type meetings. I’ve already spent too much of my life sitting on my butt. Which reminds me….
  2. I will go to a yoga class, swim, or walk to the park at least once per week starting  Friday.
  3.  I need to limit my involvement in politics.  I care about what’s happening in my country, and I might become involved in politics again in the future, but I have to be careful. Politics can suck time and energy away from things that sustain me, like art, writing, taking care of my home, and volunteering with first graders which I’m doing today – yay!
  4. If I go out of town, I will limit my time away to 4 days, unless my dog and husband are with me. I was just in the mountains for 7 days with a friend, and while it was beautiful there, I realized how much things can pile up and how much I like being in my own home, be it ever so humble.
  5. Thursday is art day. I’m painting tomorrow! It’s scheduled on my calendar. My art muse will be pleased and so will I.
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There’s no place like home.

 

Boundary Setting for this Busy Bee

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I tend to be one of those women who do too much. Since I retired from my 30 year career, I find myself exploring new activities that keep me busy. Too busy. Why do I do that? Maybe I just have so many different interests. Someone told me I’m a Renaissance Woman. I like the sound of that, but I want to make time for the things that are most important to me and I can’t do everything.

I went to a couple of political meetings and a local tree alliance. Both worthy causes, but what about my art which I have been neglecting? Okay, so I published my book and now I need to market it, but my painting muse is jealous!

butterfly mermaid in progress

She’s been waiting in the wings, saying Hey! What about me?

I’m going to work on this by Saturday!

Almost two weeks ago, I started volunteering at a nearby elementary school helping first graders with reading and enjoyed that, but three days later I came down with a head cold that is still with me, teaching me humility after saying, “I never get sick.” It didn’t help that I wasn’t getting enough sleep, staying up late on the computer…

One good thing I did a few months ago was to get back into yoga classes. It was in yoga class that I learned the chant: From now on, I send you only love.  I said it to myself in the mirror. It felt good, especially after I stuck out my tongue and laughed with myself.  I want to keep doing yoga once a week. Plus, I’m getting back into walking and will keep swimming when the waves aren’t too rough.

But I have to be more careful about taking on new things. So, I’m going to say this again: I’m not going to take on anything new.  No new projects until the following have happened:

1.  I’ve satisfied my painting muse (and finished my butterfly mermaid)

2. September is passed.

I’m helping a friend organize an event that takes place in September which is also the month I plan to visit my son and son and granddaughter. in the mountains. I’m so excited and have to stay well for that trip which means I need to get off the computer by midnight.

If anyone asks me to do anything new, my answer will be,

“Let me think about it and get back to you.”

Even if I really want to do it, I’m going to wait before I respond, to give myself time to evaluate.

With writing, I sit a lot which has caused some problems for me. So I don’t want to add any activities that are mostly sitting. If I take on anything new, after September, it has to be something healthy, fun, and physically active that gets me off my butt!

Like this:

girl swimming thumbs up

Photo from Pixabay

 

Honoring the Gift of Art

 

Healing

Let Healing Flow, by JoAnne Silvia

Wondering what to do with this blog, since I have another one that takes priority, I was thinking of dropping this one. But then the idea came to me to use this as a place to honor my visual art.

The painting above reminds me of a difficult time of my life and the gift of art as therapy. Things are so much better now. Healing flows when I return to the gifts of art, animals, and nature, my first loves.

I’m not sure what will develop here, but maybe I don’t need to worry about it. Maybe I can just let it happen. That would be different. And wonderful!

What are your healing gifts?

Finding My Wings

The Spiritual Passenger,

right on time,

read my mind

Before knowing me:

“Say for instance, you fear trying to use your artistic gifts to pursue a career.”

That’s the one.

And with that, the fear within the questions:

Can I depend on the offer to support me living that dream?

Is it possible that I can depend on someone other than myself?

Am I worth that much,

that someone would give me such a gift?

The answers came, to nourish wings

longing for flight.

I have taken the leap.

I’m flying!

bird in blue sky

 

Inspired by:

http://thespiritualpassenger.com/2015/11/11/overcoming-fear/

 

Questions To Overcome Obstacles

I’ve been posting a lot on “Anything is Possible” but realized it’s time to get back to “Loving Me, Too.”

Here’s something that’s been waiting patiently in the wings:

Susan’s post: http://www.gardenofedenblog.com/atoz-blog-challenge-o-for-obstacles/

asked these questions which I felt compelled to respond to. I’ve done so in a stream of consciousness style with just a little editing.  The  questions were great prompts for helping me take a look at my life.

What is preventing me from living a larger and more loving life?

There’s this thing called time. It goes faster and faster each year. You’d think I would have more of it now that I’m “retired,” but there is so much I want to do. Get to the question. It’s not just time, it’s fear, too. I need to look at each activity and evaluate it’s value. Some things have to be done. A related question is: What would living a larger, more loving life look like?

In what way am I not living in what remains of my life, as authentically as possible?

I seem to be outgrowing some people and activities that have been obligations for many years. I’m just starting to step back from those and stepping into more creative activities with more creative people, like my volunteer work on the Forest of Dreams mural and rock painting. I used to want to take up rock climbing. Now, I’m taking up rock painting. I want to do more of that and more work in and with nature.

In what way do I collude in oppressing my own self? Especially as we know that time is no longer infinite as we thought it was.

I have this sense of obligation, a historically over-developed sense of responsibility. My “good girl” is firmly entrenched in my personality. She has served me well in some ways, but she has held me back, too. I don’t want to be a bad girl, I just want to be more, me. I want to continue to grow spiritually and mentally in ways that don’t feel like “busy work.” I don’t want to be on a committee. I want to help children learn to read, and I want to paint more and swim more and take more walks in the woods. I want to make time for these things.  I will stop colluding in my own oppression by taking my time in responding to requests to engage in activities that don’t feel like me. I will ask myself, is this how I want to spend my time? Is this the best use of my skills and talents? God gave me the talents of drawing and painting, but I did not value them much in the past. God gave me patience. I want to use that patience with children and animals.

So, now, I need to ask myself: What am I going to do about it?

Just answering these questions over a month ago has made a difference. I’m painting more and I’m not on any committees.  Lot’s of ideas and possibilities in the works!

Here’s one of my recent paintings on a piece of scrap wood. I had called her “Umbrella Angel.” But someone pointed out the whale’s tail. So she’s my first whale’s tail angel.

Whale's Tail Angel #1

 

 

#One-liner Wednesday . . .joy

I’m so moved by Amanda Clark’s art and thankful to have found it through “Purple Rays.”

Amanda’s beautiful work reminds me of the poem, “Wild Geese,” by Mary Oliver, especially the line about letting the “soft animal of your body love what it loves.” It whispers welcome home. Here’s the poem:

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting —
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

Purplerays

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Be joyful on your journey . .

Beautiful art by Amanda Clark
Text & image source: GODDESS CENTRAL https://web.facebook.com/goddesscentral/

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