The Long and Winding Road of Becoming Me

She thew away her masks and put on her soul

First, I wanted to be a veterinarian

and save the whales

Or maybe a biologist

and save the world.

But way before that,

I was an artist.

I could draw dogs and horses

All day long.

No one taught me this.

I just did it.

And people said I was a good.

I loved to write,

And make up stories in my head.

But I didn’t value those stories much.

I didn’t value my drawings and paintings

As much as I wanted to save the planet

But trigonometry hurt my brain.

So I ended up in the mind field.

Fixing me more than anyone else.

While God helped me

Help people

Save themselves.

And taught me things

I needed to learn

About saving time for me.

Along the way,

I’ve saved dogs,

I’ve saved cats,

I’ve saved trees,

And  God saved me some time.

Because the long and winding road

Never disappears.

It always lead me back to my roots

Back to the work of my soul.

 

 

I love how this song can be about anything we want to come back home to.

One-Liner Wednesday: It’s Never Too Late

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“It’s Never Too Late to Become What you Might Have Been.”

 

I’m counting on it.

Since I was ten years old, I’ve had a talent for drawing. And I’ve loved to write for as long as I can remember. But I never pursued these creative arts seriously. I just didn’t think they were important enough.

Now, I’m about to turn 61. Beyond midlife. Or maybe not, but it doesn’t matter, because I have today and hopefully tomorrow.

Inspired by Jana Green’s post:

http://thebeggarsbakery.net/2015/12/11/the-dream-makers-daughters-women-stepping-out-in-mid-life/

One Liner Wednesday is brought to you by Linda Hill at

https://lindaghill.com/2016/12/07/one-liner-wednesday-the-answer-is-right-in-front-of-you/

Here’s what Linda says about the rules:

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

The Essence of Your Dreams

Lorrie’s words sing to us: Listen to your heart. Honor your truth. Follow the essence of your dreams. Celebrate even the smallest steps.

Lorrie Bowden

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“In fertile soil

may the essence of your dreams

grow into magnificent blossoms.”

~ Blessitude

Listen.  Listen to your heart.

To the place inside that is yearning.

Is there a dream not realized…

Something that won’t go away?

Listen.  Listen to the longing.

Honor the truth

And make a plan.

Your destiny awaits.

I’m really beginning to realize that each and every one of us comes into this world to play a part, or role, that is integral to the whole of the story.

I believe that deep down, in that place that no one else hears, there is a voice that speaks to us and guides us to our destiny.

I also believe that we spend an awful lot of time edging that voice out with the thinking voice in our head.

Here’s to quieting the mind and allowing the essence of our dreams to speak in tones we…

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Retirement Ball on the Horizon

Getting ready for the next big step in loving me, too.

Anything is Possible!

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Retirement is coming, and it’s gonna be a ball.

Not the kind of ball Cinderella went to, or the Marine Corps Ball my parents went to when I was a kid. Not a volleyball that I really enjoyed in college, but it might hurt my hands now, unless they have Nerf volleyball for seniors.

Wait a minute. I’m not really a senior. Am I? I don’t feel like a senior. Okay, I am 60, and I am tired more than I used to be… Oh, let’s not go there.

Let’s go back to the ball! For me, having a ball is going to be writing, painting (both art and walls of my little urban cottage) puttering around the yard as I sculpt mother nature just a tad, and naps! I love naps. That would have sounded boring to me 30 or 40 years ago, before I had kids, but ever…

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Moving Closer

mountains and lttle flowers

Moving slowly it seems

but moving closer

One day at a time

to the edge of the cliff.

Like a turtle

Close to the ground

I cannot see far ahead,

Until I climb upon a knoll.

Then I see open spaces

Filled with vast beauty

Hazy at times

Like misty mountains

Off in the distance.

But when I look

With my mind’s eye,

Yellow angels dance

Just beyond the edge.

They beckon me home

To my cozy cottage

Where a secret doorway

Opens to a place

I’ve only glimpsed

A place of possibility

Where lush green trees

Grow ripe fruit

And knowing birds

Sing heart songs

Of wings ready

For take off.

More peace

More freedom

More of the me

I was meant to be

Waits there

With open arms.

 

2016 will be a year of big changes in my life. I am thankful for all of you who support and encourage me in writing which is a big part of the creative life that waits for me. Thank you for being part of the journey! And thank you for sharing your own thoughts and adventures!

Happy New Year!

My First Soul Collage

Last week, I went to a training conference I go to every year for addiction professionals. I used vacation time and paid the registration fee myself, so I didn’t feel guilty at all about picking fun elective sessions.

Some of the sessions were about addiction. I learned about methylation, in which certain chemical compounds attach to genes and change them, for example, when a person is traumatized, but they can also detach over time for healing to take place. It reminds me of how we used to think the mind and body were separate, but they aren’t so much. The mind and body are in constant communication, at many levels. I also learned about story listening, something I already knew intuitively. I was intrigued by how we listen from the frame of reference of our own stories. We need to be aware of that to help us listen objectively, using the speaker’s own words. No wonder being a counselor can be so tiring. We’ve got our own stories going on, and our old stories brought up by clients as we listen to their stories, and, as the old 90s punk rock lyrics go,”you gotta keep ’em separated.” It’s important to do our own personal “work” to keep the stories from getting mixed up. Because our own stories will try to mingle. We are human, after all.

The best part of the conference was the Soul Collage workshop taught by Margaret Wyche .

First, we got some history about Soul Collage  developed by Seena B. Frost, MA, M.Div., and the process. We were asked to write down a question or concern we wanted to know more about.

I’ve made lots of collages and used collage making in my groups with clients. This was different in that the pictures are already torn out of magazines. We each went through a big stack of pictures with the direction to not think at all, to not look for pictures, but let the images choose us.  Several chose me. We were encouraged to use one picture for the 5 x 7 background, and then to add 3 to 5 smaller images on top. Two images pulled me stronger than the others: the rock arch and the elephant couple.

Elephant soul collage

(If these images belong to you, thank you! Please let me know, so I can give you credit, etc.)

Though it was suggested that we use 3 to 5 images on top of the background, I honored my instincts and only used the elephants on top of the rocky background with the blue sky.

After we created our soul collages, we paired up and asked each other a list of questions about our collage. The creator of the collage was to answer as if they were the card/collage. Here are the questions and the answers from my collage:

Who are you?

I am your deepest truth….I am the one who can heal your family….I am the one who loves you, walks with you, answers questions….believes in you.

What do you have to give me?

I give you peace, understanding, confidence,…. strength.

What do you want from me?

I want you to have faith. I want you to remember who walks beside you.

Is there anything else you want to tell me?

Don’t be so serious. Let go. Let go of fear. Be brave. You are strong.

How will I remember?

You will remember when you are challenged.

This powerful experience reminded me to be aware of my own strength, and to trust in the relationship with my loving partner as we walk through the challenges presented to us.

Thanks for sharing my soul collage initiation!