“Wait Is a Four Letter Word.”

Loving me, too, means learning to trust the timing.

Anything is Possible!

When God says, “Wait,” we can control only two things: how we wait and who we become along the way.  __Elizabeth Laing Thompson

When God Says Wait Enter for a chance to win a free copy by signing up for my monthly newsletter to the right >>>

It’s always something. If it’s not waiting for your soulmate, it’s waiting for your kids to become independent, or waiting to retire, or waiting for your manuscript to be ready for publication.

I’ve just started reading the book, When God Says Wait, by Elizabeth Thompson. It’s easy to read with well-fictionalized biblical stories, personal stories from the author, and simple exercises at the end of each chapter. I sure could’ve used this book 15 years ago when I was wondering if I’d ever fall in love again, if I’d ever find a partner who’d be a good fit. Still, the messages about “navigating life’s detours…

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Impenetrable

iron-fence

There was a time I wished to be impenetrable. I had opened myself too wide, become too vulnerable to the wrong person and never wanted to let that happen again. Fear kept my fences up and well-guarded.

Years went by, and I became accustomed to the loneliness. At least I was safe. I had my friends, my dogs, and I finally loved myself. That should be enough, I thought.

But when I had learned the lessons I needed to learn, a long lost love came knocking at my gate. Would I have the courage to let him in? Was he worth the risk?

This is the song I sang to myself during our second courtship.

 

Telling the larger story is my work in progress.

This post is inspired by the prompt: “impenetrable” provided by “Blog Woman”

And brought to us by Shanjeniah, for Linda Hill’s Just Jot It January series, which can be found at:

https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/16/jusjojan-daily-prompt-jan-16th17/

just-jot-january

The rules for Just Jot It January are as follows:

1. It’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list) counts as a “Jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. The prompts will be posted every day at 2am my time (GMT -5). You don’t have to follow the prompt word, but this will be where you leave your link for others to see. Make sure you link your post to the correct day’s prompt. There will be a post like this every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday, and Saturday, when you’ll find the prompt on my usual Friday Reminder post for Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS).

3. As long as your blog is on WordPress, you’ll be able to link via pingback. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! If you’re participating from another blogging host, just drop a link into the comment section. Note: The newest pingbacks and comments will be at the top.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. The prompts are here both to remind you and to inspire you to write. However, you don’t have to use the prompt word of the day. You can link any kind of jot back here. Even your shopping list. Note: If it’s 18+ content, please say so in a comment with your link.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge (above) in your post so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!

If you’d like to look ahead to see the upcoming prompt words, click this link: https://lindaghill.com/2016/12/31/just-jot-it-january-2017-rules/ You can always write your post ahead of time and schedule it to come out on the appropriate day.

Coming Home to Art

JoAnne painting rabbits

Painting bunnies in the Forest of Dreams

I  did it!  On the 1st day of June, at the age of 60, I made a leap of faith by cutting back to one day a week at my counseling job. Accepting my new-ish husband’s offer of financial support so that I could spend more time following my creative dreams has been scary. I was the super responsible bread winner for over thirty years, during my first marriage, and then as a single mom. Could I trust a man to support me?  But weary of the  burdens of growing paperwork in the mental health field, I  knew it was time to honor my own needs. God gave me creative talents, but I had not valued them, or maybe I needed to learn some things before coming back to the creative arts. Either way, I’m more thankful than I can express.

The synchronicity of perfect timing affirmed my decision. At the end of May, as my leaping day approached, I won blue ribbons for writing and sold one of my original paintings along with a couple of prints at Silver Arts, part of Senior Games. It was also in the second half of May that I went to the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writer’s Conference and got valuable feedback. And in May, I started working on the community mural, A Forest of Dreams. Support of my artistic skill flowed freely, nurturing my decision to follow the call back home to art.

Not that painting and writing are easy. I’m not fast. I don’t think I’ve ever been fast at anything. But when I paint or write, or play my guitar, I lose track of time. I become absorbed in the creative process that feeds my soul.

I’m not sharing all this to toot my own horn, though it’s okay to do that. I ask you to celebrate with me, and to know, this:

“It’s never too late to be what you might have been.”  Mary Ann Evans/George Eliot

Later this week, I’ll write  more about the Forest of Dreams Mural in “Anything is Possible,” and I’ll share that post here on “Loving Me, Too.” Thanks for reading and for sharing this journey with me!

Fear and Desire

“What do you fear about writing?  And what do you want more than the fear?”
                                                                                                                 Andi Cumbo-Floyd

 

I fear the uncertainty of being a writer,

I fear judgement.

But hasn’t life been uncertain anyway?

Haven’t I judged myself

more harshly than anyone else?

I fear being an artist.

But haven’t I been an artist

my whole life?

My creative pursuits

have taken a back seat

for most of my life.

Do I fear being me?

The real me?

I feel nervous about cutting back

on the job that pays the bills for now,

the job that’s paid the bills for 30 years.

I feel nervous about trusting a man

To provide for me

Even the the man of my dreams.

I know it’s only a little fear.

It shrinks as faith grows.

 

What do I want more than the fear?

I want to tell my stories

The stories that need telling.

I want the excitement of finding words

that fit together

in a way that gives hope

and healing.

I want to feel the joy

of allowing my Creator

to work through me

with words, or pen, or paint

to deliver messages of  hope

and love.

I want peace.

The peace of coming home.

The peace that wants to find me.

I want to be the boss of me.

I know God is the ultimate boss of me.

But it would be so much better

To have fewer bosses.

 

And didn’t I pray for deliverance?

This is the answer to that prayer!

 

I desire freedom.

I know all about the responsibility

that comes with freedom.

I’ve been responsible all my life

Well, except for a year here and there.

I’ve learned from those mistakes.

 

I’m almost ready

For the leap of Faith

To accept the gift

To be myself

To save the rest of my life.

 

parachute-542831_960_720.jpg from pixabay

“Running Start”

https://pixabay.com/en/users/21150-21150/

 

WHEN YOU ARE READY…

When the time is right, the right thing, person or lesson will come.

ENLIGHTENMENT ANGELS

When You Are Ready…

Have you ever bought a book, wanted to take a class, heard about a movie or thought about writing a book, but after one or all of these items pops into your mind that you would like to do, see, or hear, you get distracted – stop what you are doing – and begin to pick up on another matter.  Do not beat yourself up about this!  Trust me, this is ok as it was not the right time for you to do, see or hear about this particular item.  Everything in it time and in its place.

“Thought for Today” When you are ready, the time will come for you to pick-up that book you have been meaning to read or attend a meditation group to connect with other like minded people,  Don’t beat yourself up for procrastinating, because you are exactly where you need…

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First Love

Today’s Stream of Consciousness gave me a deeper appreciation for my journey, and my first love.

Anything is Possible!


SOC badge with butterfly

I met my first love in the fall of 1971, when I was 16 years old. I felt like my heart would break when he had to move 700 miles back to Connecticut with his family. A lady I babysat for told me that if we were meant to be together, we would be. That helped.

As broken hearted as I was over my first boyfriend moving, after we’d only gone steady for about 7 months, suicide never seriously crossed my mind.

The first time I thought about suicide was in my early twenties. I thought about walking out in front of a truck. It had to do with the break up with another boyfriend, and not knowing what I was going to do with my life. ….But my younger sister had been killed by a drunk driver and that hurt my parents so much, I could not hurt them…

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